BLISTERS SUCK
Ragnar Lodbrok, a Viking warrior of great renown, could be felled by a minuscule pustule on his posterior heel. Whether we are a super-athletes or mild exercisers, we have all felt completely defeated by these seemingly small injuries: blisters. They look mild; they feel like death. In one moment mild foot discomfort can turn into searing pain, that weird constipated-looking-flat-footed walk and an actual moment where going Aron Ralston on your foot might feel like a better way to go. They SUCK. They DOUBLE SUCK ---and can ruin just about every type of trek, vacation or night out. But don’t worry; I have been to hell and back to find you the answers you have been looking for. To properly show you how to prevent and manage blisters, I had to get some first.
My arduous journey of self-destruction began with a trip to the local thrift store, where I purchased a pair of $7.00, second-hand hiking shoes that didn’t fit quite right. This is where I will insert your first line of defense against blisters: wear shoes that fit properly. This means getting sized by the shoe guy. You may think you are a 10 but in fact be a 9.5, and this matters because the more your sweaty foot shifts in a hot shoe the more likely for that friction to result in your epidermal layers separating.
The other item I picked out at the thrift store might frighten you: old socks. Worn out, stained, single layered and synthetic, I knew these would not wick away moisture and conversely trap my foot in a smelly steam box. Nowadays, there are some really fancy moisture-wicking two layer hiking socks that prevent rubbing and keep your feet nice and fresh. Buy a few pair, and always have an extra pair in your pack. If I was doing this the right way, I would rub antiperspirant on my feet, which have this cold perma-sweat thing going. Then I would sprinkle them with baby powder and wear the fancy socks and proper shoes. But I wanted to do this the wrong way. I shoved my clammy feet in the old socks, laced up my shoes haphazardly, and headed off to a long day hike that involved a lot of rock scrambling and varied terrain, perfect climate to form blisters and a shit-how-far-is-the-car situation. Another preventative measure (that I have purposefully avoided) is the old ballerina trick of putting either a skin-toughening spray or lubricant on sensitive areas before you begin, just in case you are interested. What follows are a couple snapshots of how the hike went, and the pain I went through.
Two miles up the trail portion of the hike (I hadn’t even hit the boulders yet) my left big toe and pinky toe had been rubbed red and were starting to form dreaded blisters. Taping was my first attempt at relief. If you are taping your feet midway through a hike, make sure to air those babies out first so the tape adheres. If you have an antiseptic lotion, rub that on the blister first to reduce swelling. I used duct tape in this case, because in my opinion there is not an emergency situation where duct tape is not useful, however moleskin and athletic tape are excellent albeit slightly more expensive options. If you have a blister, DO NOT POP IT! That fluid is your body creating its own protection, and performing minor surgery on yourself will just make it worse, I promise. I continued on, but it wasn’t long before I needed more help.
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Another hour, another hiccup…I had reached the boulder-scramble portion of my hike and this tape shit was no longer working #arwethereyet. I sat down, peeled off the slimy tape which had this really awesome viscous consistency, aired my feet out again, drank water, and decided what to do next. Mission accomplished. I had blisters on both feet. I contemplated ditching the shoes altogether, but I am not really one of those barefoot-hiker people. Something had to be done so I reached deep in my pack for the big guns. Enter my favorite product: Band-Aid brand Blister Block. I rubbed that everywhere I felt chafing. Then I put on 2nd Skin Adhesive knits, several of them, so my feet were a bit mummified. I dreamt about my fancy socks as I grimaced and slid the sweaty synthetic one on. I had to stick it out, at least to stick it to you people, so I carefully continued and took my time. The rest of the hike was okay. I had blisters, which DOUBLE SUCK, but I was still able to scramble up the rocks, enjoy the lake when I finally got there, and mosey back down the 6-miles to my vehicle.
What I hope you can take away from my painful experience is that small investments (mainly in the sock and shoe department) and preventative measures are the way to go rather than trying to react to a blister when it has already formed. I know that going with the flow is cooler than being anal about preparation (especially for climbers) but a little foresight can save you a lot of heartache and in my case suicidal thoughts. Carry some of the items I have mentioned above in your pack. Even if your feet, which are dry, pre-taped, powdered and lubed-up don’t need any of the emergency supplies, you might just be the blister guardian (have you heard of this amazing creature?) to another poor soul. You will spot one of these unfortunate fellows by the constipated walk and that pressed-lip smile that means they are clenching their teeth so hard they are incapable of speaking. #happyfeet